“At the Moment Girl.”

What is an “At The Moment Girl”? an ATMG is apparently someone entertaining ,who can be ridiculously fun to talk to yet you find yourself attracted (sexually also) to her. There would always be something that can make you an ATMG like how you are as a person or if there is something as stupid as distance blocking you from that person. Apparently Ladies and of course, Gentlemen I am an ” ATMG” because someone just said it to my face, call it a slap if you must, but it hurts to know that you are just that to a person who you might like. I know it is silly and so naive of me to think of this but wouldn’t you get hurt?.

A friend of mine is going through this similar situation as of right now and I feel bad for her, I kept thinking what if that happened to me? and BAM! all my thinking came true it did happen to me, a couple of times already and I feel like I would never learn. I am stupid enough to let my guard down when someone decides to charm me continuously without fail and then I would think fast forward,blush and think how silly I am, When in fact being silly is all I am ever good at, At this point, I am so scared of being hurt again  but I want to continue on, don’t you get that feeling also? I know everyone does and it irritates me because I am so rational at times, but I let myself be irrational especially when it comes to a certain someone and it hurts. I remember my aunt telling me about the time her friend met this author who had everything but he was a horrible human being, he had book tours in each state in the United States,having more girlfriends than he can possibly count and one of those girlfriends was my aunt’s friend who fell terribly in love with him but he mucked around her so that ruined everything. Imagine the psychological pain you are putting that person through, what if that hurts too much? and what if you can’t bear it? I think I can bear it, at least I think I can but there’s me being scared again. I don’t understand why so many people and I can’t just go along with the flow, am I too much of a cynic for my own good that I can’t even allow myself to feel so much? but wait let me rephrase that. Why can’t I be too much of a cynic so I can’t feel much at all?  is it that difficult? too many questions and no answers at all, as Sam from The Perks once said : “Why do I and everyone I love pick people who treat us like we are nothing” I know I drifted off the topic but isn’t that a good question? it’s the reason why I wrote this because being an ATMG is related to this. because liking someone hurts that much and once you let yourself like someone you can’t stop anymore until it becomes something good or something to ruin you, and darlings it is about time we don’t let ourselves get ruined for the sake of men or women that we like, hell they might not even deserve what we feel for them, because you can just be an ATMP (At The Moment Person) just like that and they can easily dispose you, no matter how much you like them, so the best thing you can do is to detach yourself quickly if you can but do it normally or he/ she will know something is up (but he/she might’ve known if you are that obvious) sounds like a lot of work right, I know, but you know earlier I kept telling myself NO to all these little thoughts I’m having because it will never work nor will it ever be possible and he thinks that, because the thing is with everyone regardless of their gender, they would pick someone so practical for themselves even though that person might be wrong for them, they still pursue it because it is PRACTICAL but when you want your dream person you want to be irrational and not even as practical, because you love that person, and I tell you that whoever has that luck in the world is the luckiest bitch/bastard in the world because they get to be with that one perfect person in the world.

 

AMEN,

 

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